Journeys With Jani

Y’all, let me tell you something I hear way too often:

“Your trauma made you stronger.”

Now, I know folks usually mean well when they say that. They’re trying to put a little inspirational bow on a big ol’ box of mess. But every time I hear it, I have to resist the urge to squint my eyes, tilt my head, and ask, “Did it, though? Did it really?”

Because no, sugar. My trauma did not make me stronger.

It didn’t give me some magical resilience superpower.

It didn’t transform me into the Bionic Woman.

It didn’t give me abs, clear skin, or a better credit score.

You know what it did give me?

A very dark, very inappropriate sense of humor.

Oh—and the ability to make a room full of people laugh with a story that probably should’ve ended in therapy instead of a punchline.

So when someone says,

“Your trauma made you stronger.”

I smile sweetly, lean in close, and reply:

“It absolutely did not. But it did make me funny. And I’ll take that.”

Because let’s be honest—

Strength is overrated.

Funny pays the bills, gets the laughs, and heals the heart in its own sideways, sarcastic, southern way.

And if I’ve got to carry my baggage, honey, you better believe I’m gonna monogram it and turn it into a stand-up set.

XOXO, Jani